Stuff Your Stockingfoots

The Drake’s 2015 Holiday Gift Guide

From splurge-worthy sleds to specialty apps you’ll want to pass on to all your fishing-addicted loved ones, welcome to The Drake’s Annual Festivus Collectivus—Winter 2015 edition.

 Trump-y

The Trump-y is a brash twist on the original Humpy pattern popularized by Jackson, WY-based fly tier Jack Dennis in his Western Trout Fly Tying Manual. Fly features include a bloated tinsel mid-section; AAA batteries; a prenup; angst; isolationism; and one unruly clump of urine-stained kangaroo hair.

$699 for a doz., trumpyfly.com

 

Tesla Model JS
Available now for pre-order, the Tesla Jet Sled allows you to silently and smugly glide through your home waters pollution free. Powered by three 700-lb battery banks and drafting only three feet of water on step, the stylish JS boasts a max speed of 9 knots and a range of 6 river miles.

$78,000, electricsleds.com

 

Gluten Free Frog’s Fanny
For the dry-fly angler with moderate to severe gluten skin allergy. Same desiccant action as original Frog’s Fanny.

$7, thewarongluten.com

 

Deeter’s Bobbers
Field & Stream correspondent Kirk Deeter shocked the Internet when he blogged about bobber abuse earlier this year. But it’s a little known fact that Deeter is the mastermind behind a lucrative bobber industry. And the story was nothing more than a stunt to drive sales. No shit. Check out his website for discounts now through the New Year.

bobberbaron.com

 

ExTenzer® App
This new hand-shrinking app will instantly make your pic of a 6-inch dink look like a celebrity slab. Simply upload grip-and-grins, select Toad, Jumbo or Hawg Johnson, and watch your catch grow. Comes with ExTenzer® Instagram filter too.

FREE, extenzer.com

 

The Last Steelhead
Adipose Media’s fictional biopic of Slippery Jim, the last wild steelhead. Set in 2020, the camera follows Jim from egg to his failed attempt to find a female to spawn with. Produced by NOAA.

$25 on Blue Ray or Amazon Prime, functionallyextinct.com