Nuclear Fishing Report

Blinky, the three-eyed fish native to the waters near the Springfield Nuclear Power Plant, has recently migrated to a toxic reservoir in Argentina’s Córdoba province. Reputed for their speed, cunning, and 20/20/20 vision, “blinkies” are also welcomed at the dinner table. Try pairing filets with virus-resistant squash and anti-cancer purple tomato chutney… and always an ice-cold Duff beer.

“We were fishing and we got the surprise of getting this rare specimen. As it was dark at that time we did not notice, but then you looked at him with a flashlight and saw that he had a third eye,” said fisherman Julián Zmutt of his unusual discovery.

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